==>

DAVE: youre going to get alcohol poisoning
KARKAT: DAVE. LOOK AT ME. FUCKINF LOOK. AT. ME. ID RATHER *DIE* THSN GO FULL TRICKSTER FUVK
DAVE: i think youre drunk enough dude
DAVE: if you start to feel happiness
DAVE: which i know is a foreign emotion to your crabby ass
DAVE: drink more
KARKAT: OK TAHTS ACTUALLY A GOOD PLAN
DAVE: see? im a genius
KARKAT: DONT PUSH IT
DAVE: oh im pushing it
DAVE: its being pushed
KARKAT: DO YIU KNOW EHAT *ELSE* IS GONNA GET PUSHED IF YOUBDONT STOP?
DAVE: no i do not
KARKAT: *YOU*
DAVE: i highly doubt you have the ability to walk to me without falling on your face and eating shit at this point
KARKAT: OH YOUD BE SURPRIESD
DAVE: will i? will i really be surprised
KARKAT: MAYBEE
DAVE: maybe
KARKAT: WE WILL SEE
DAVE: sure dude
DAVE: sure
KARKAT: LISTEN. JUST CAUSE TEH TRICKSTER CRAP HASNT GOTTEN TO MY HEAD DOESNT MEAN I CANT TUEN YIU INTO ONR
DAVE: dont you have to have one of those giant whirlypop lollipops to do that
KARKAT: WASNT THSI SHIT ALSO CONTAGEOUS BY TOUCH OR SOEMTHING???
DAVE: how would i know dude
DAVE: pretty sure everyone saw you get hit in the face with a sucker
KARKAT: WELL EITGER WAY I BET I COULS JSUT GO AND ACQUIERE ONE EASILY, TYERES KINF OF AN OUTBRJE GOINF ON IDK IF YOU NOTCED
DAVE: im immune
KARKAT: OH *REALLY*???;? WANNS FIND OIT?
DAVE: i was joking but also i do not want to find out